Saturday morning I heard the car start and drive awayand there was my eager sister in her football jerseynightgown. “You ready `cause I sure am?...#8221; She pulled backthe covers and squealed. “Oh damn. It’s beautiful. How’dyou ever grow such a monster? Lord, I’ve never seenanything like it. How big is it?”I rolled over and hurried to the bathroom and pissed,relieving the pressure. When I got back, she was lyingon my bed, smiling. “Come on, big boy, come. . The next day I breakfasted on cereal and toast – slightly over done toast, but I was proud of the effort – and instant coffee. I went to work. Mid morning, my mobile phone rang.“Don Upthorpe.”“Oh, Mister Upthorpe. I’m Sister Hopkins at Broomfield Hospital. We couldn’t find anything physically wrong with your wife, and she surfaced early this morning. She ... I’m sorry to say ... it was felt necessary to refer her for a psychiatric assessment. I expect you’ll be hearing from them.”“Well, thank. More

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