I have GOT to get to my wife! I have the biggest hard-on I have ever had, and I’ve got to get to her NOW!” The other guy says “Okay. Do you want...me to come with you?” “What the hell for?” asks the other. “Because that’s MY dick you’re holding!” he says.A blonde walked into a doctor’s office with two burnt ears. The doctor asked her “What happened to your ear?” The blonde replied “I was ironing and the phone rang, so instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and put it to my ear.. He reached behind her head and released the gag.Immediately it was out, Tabitha tried to talk, "Oooh, tank oo, tank oo... I be good, I promise!" Slowly, she began to be able to talk. "I can't suck proper around that thing... "Hmmph," Dumbjohn grunted. "Next you'll want your hands..." It'd help! I can't go anywhere, tacked to a board..." Tabitha realized that she'd gone too far when the sonofabitch torturing her got a speculative look on his face. "Uh, but it's not important. I've got my mouth. More

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