My yearning was oppressive. I spoke out loud. “God, I am so lonely. Why can’t I find someone? If only I were desirable to beautiful women.” ... didn’t think I was really addressing God, just a figure of speech. But the result was immediate and powerful. I began to perspire, my body tingled and my penis stirred. It pressed against my clothes. A voice, it came from within me for sure, but it was not me, said that my wish, now revealed, would come true. A true Westerner, I discounted what I. In my fourteen year old mind, I knew this was where I was intended to be. My life before this seemed like nothing but a dream.When we awoke in the morning, showered, and I fixed him breakfast. We left the dishes on the table and went to the bedroom immediately. He took me normally, and while it felt good having his cock inside of me and I knew that he enjoyed it so I felt good about that, but I just couldn't come. I realized for that to happen, I would need some pain. I wandered if this was. More

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