.. to myself, actually. It worked.“Duh ... wuhh ... You can’t...” he said, now hovering over his seat.“SIT. DOWN. Or I will beat you senseless...with that machine. You will sit down, you will ask your obscene, accusatory questions and then you’ll go and tell someone who cares that I lied and for the first time in your pathetic life you will be RIGHT.”“You can’t...”“I’m between you and the door. I can do whatever I like, mate. And I can ‘ave you. Easy. Smash your teeth on the edge of that desk.. Last year, you almost caught hypothermia when your family left the house, thinking you had decided to spend the holidays with your then-girlfriend of 5 years. What made this particularly bad was that your girlfriend dumped you, via fucking the Mall Santa, Barnaby Willows, a 30 something year old slob. Apparently, your girlfriend and Barnaby have been “seeing each other” since she hit puberty. At that point, you thought the worst would be over, but then your car dies 5 miles away from your house. More

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