I was already a bit dejected. I’d put my heart into this story. Toughen up, old man.“Okay. Let’s start with the story arc. I think you could beg...n with something more dramatic that draws the reader into the story more rapidly. It’s the third page before we have a clue that they are boarding a spaceship. Lead with it. Even a simple a sentence of thought from the main character that said, ‘I took one last look at the earth before I boarded for my journey to the stars.’ Something that immediately. Then, once he was sure that all eyes were upon him, he turned to Miss Du Bois and smiled. Jackson knew the evidence was overwhelming, but in his experience, many such cases had still been lost to nothing more than a sympathetic defendant and dirt being thrown in the air. This dirt was his speciality. He was a very large man, as tall as Philippe and a good twenty kilos heavier. Without speaking a single word he seemed to take command the court as he slowly rose from his chair. Casually . More

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