"As he was talking, I remembered the conversation I had with myself inthe lift. I took a deep breath and said, "I like the way I am. I know itall seem... very quick and I have messed up so many times in my life, butnow, right at this moment, I love being a girl. I love the clothes andthe way I look. I feel more alive than I have been in a long time andalthough I'm constantly afraid of being outed or laughed at, I feel thatI want to try to be the best girl that I can. I don't know if I want tostay. That thought led to another that made me smile as I fingered myself, my son had a teenage crush on me, he thought I didn't know, but I had seen it almost as soon as the crush developed. What had surprised me though was three years on he still had that crush, it was flattering, but not enough to give me confidence, not at my age.Sometimes, at moments such as this, Paul became my fantasy lover, the idea or the act of incest held no terrors for me. Goodness knows why, but I just couldn't get to a. More

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