“Can I get a good luck hug, Daddy?” I asked.“Hmm, you know, you have been particularly queer lately,” he remarked. “That’s very unchar...cteristic of you. Is there something that I should know?”“Not at all, Daddy,” I answered. “Not at all.”My dad reluctantly hugged me. As we hugged, I kicked the bloomers across the room and out of sight. By the time the hug ended, I was in the clear.“Oh, I thought I should mention this,” my dad remarked. “I think that uniform might be too small for you. I. I offer it only as an example of how not to do dialect because it is bloody difficult to read. Oh yes, and I used Lord Lucan as a nom dee ploom because I can see the old family seat from my window. Or I could if the snow would let up. I don't expect a TPA greater than 1.1.1., but you can please yourselves, and I'm sure you will"Interstishul' yer say?"There I is, sat in a corner of the local's bar in the 'Jovial Tar'. What a bloody daft name that be. 'Twere the Jolly Sailor afore all they. More

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