I took her on a long drive, and we went to a pizzeria almost outside the city.We ordered pizza to the car. While we were waiting for the order to arri...e, I asked her what was wrong. She tried to avoid the topic and smiled. I forced her to tell me what was wrong, and out of nowhere, she started crying. I was shocked looking at a girl so happy, always suddenly bursting out.I asked her to let it out. She started cursing her mother and even said she doesn’t want to live in that house. I couldn’t. Yet, I still feel she can, now that she's actually seeing me dressed, soeasily reject them, reject me. That fear that if I were ever found out,it would end my life. Just watching others react to transgenderedpeople who come out, and you just know that thoughts like sexualperversion and its close kin, child molestation, are only a hair-breadthaway in most people's minds.Jillian has been so understanding, so accepting, but with eachrevelation, with each peeling back of the years I've kept. More

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