”But she did anyway and she even drove all the way over to Lucy's place to do it and I didn't know about it until Lucy called me late one night when...I was at home and when I picked up the phone she just said “So that was bizarre” and I said “What was?” and she said “Cait coming over here, alone, without you” and I said “She did? Why?” and Lucy said “Because she's a jealous bitch” and I gasped and said “Lucy!” because the Lucy I knew would never use that word about anyone and then I said “She's. The baby looks just like his father. I wish he looked like my husband, instead.The baby isn’t out yet. You’ll have to wait 16 years before he tells you he’s gay... Yes, ma’am, this IS the maternity hospital, but no. We don’t have any return policy.How can you tell if your gas station attendant used to be a porn star?When the gas starts coming out, he pulls out the nozzle, and sprays it on the windshield... You think of pirates as being all smiley. Actually, they’re all Somali... I was sitting. More

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