Meri wife kuch dino kai liyai apni causin kai ghar jammu gaye hui thi.un dino mai akaila hi ghar par tha.Sardiyo kai din thai.Muzai sexy books or blue...film ka shonk tha.sexy books merai ghar par pari rahiti thi,jisay mai bed kai nichay rakhta tha.Achaanak meri saasu ji mumbai sai jo apnay bhai kai yahan gaye thi aa gaye.kuch baat cheet hui or mai unkai liyai chai bannanay chala gaya tab tak woh fresh ho kar aagaye.Mai bazar mai kuch samman lainay chala gaya.humari bedsheet kuch maily thi so. Most were complimentary but several with some sincere criticism. I went back and did a thorough spell and punctuation check, and fixed some run on sentences, also paragraphs were too long. One person pointed out that I was being unrealistic on how long I was having my character hit a golf ball, the story was a fantasy but hey he was right about it being unrealistic, and he had brought it up politely so no reason not to make a change. After making those corrections I reposted the story awaiting. More

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