How was I going to maintain a happy relationship when I'm hell bent on giving myself nothing but punishment?It's so sad that I let someone break me li...e this. Causing my life to turn upside down and make me hate life as well as myself. I can't even believe in myself anymore. I've lost the desire to create and bring laughter to others. I can't bring myself to want anything, to hope or even love.I don't deserve love anyway, not even love for myself. I did a horrible thing to someone else and. I am studying in room and she talk to me that night for 3 hour till 2 o’clock in morning.Next day in class she sits with me and then days pass she became very much comfortable with me and after sometime our talks drifted to every topic including sex. She started it by asking have you done sex. I said No and asked her same thing but she never answered my question but I know that she had but we never try it because we are only friends.I told you in starting that my college is in Haryana and road. More

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