So I started going to the gym and it was helping. I still had Wanda Simmons moments, but for those 1-2 hours at the gym, I had gym equipment to worry...about.Even before Wanda died, I still had those dark thoughts but they weren’t so frequent. It’s been like that since, my early teens. Then Wanda came into my world, and she was my world, sexy, funny, adventurous, but now she’s gone. When I was feeling down in the dumps, I wanted to be around people, like now. The odd eye-candy (sexy dressed. My heart was pounding in a renewed rush of adrenaline, rendering it nearly impossible for me to even think straight. From that moment when I lay my eyes on the gorgeous dress that was in the parcel, the entire evening passed in a blurred state. I was so drunk with love for this man that I can't even recall what the dress looked like. All I remember is that he took me to this expensive French restaurant and that the real surprise consisted of the envelope he handed me between the cheese plate. More

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