. I voluntarily put myself up on the shelf. I haven't had the courage to crawl back down, and get back into the "game" as they say.That wasn't the wo...st part of it. At 40 years old, I was just waiting to die . . . just passing my time until the Grim Reaper claimed me. After Angelica I convinced myself that I would never have what everybody else had. I would never have the thing that I wanted above all else, a wife and family. So . . . here I am.My career, which once seemed promising and. The Doctor in particular felt it was particularly appropriate to pick this visit to explore with me the wonders of puberty and growth spurts and hormones and emotions. I endured an x-ray, blood tests and I did finally get to pee in a cup for someone, as I knew I would.I had a provisional clean bill of health. But mom informed me in her best Dr. Mom impression, that if any problems showed up when the tests came back, we would be heading back, and in the meantime she was keeping a close eye on. More

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