On Saturday afternoon, I was sitting in my lawn chair, drinking beer and watching my wife mow the lawn. The neighbor lady from across the street was s... outraged that she came over and shouted at me, “You should be hung!”I took a drink from my bottle of beer, wiped the cold foam from my lips, lifted my darkened sunglasses and stared directly into the eyes of this nosy ass neighbor and then calmly replied, “I am. That’s why she cuts the grass.”153. I went to the doctor the other day and found out. “I can give you 100 bucks, no… 200! Will you do it?” I asked, hoping against hope!Nikita laughed! A somewhat harsh laughter that conveyed, ‘Oh you’re such a child!’, and then she said, “I’m not a whore who will suck your dick for money! If you want me to suck your dick, you have to give me something in exchange! A service! Can you agree to that condition?” If she had asked me to work for her for ten years for this one-time service, I would probably have agreed without a second thought at that. More

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