The funeral director can’t get the coffin lid nailed on and has to discuss the alternatives with the man’s beautiful young widow. “I’m afraid ...hat the only way to get the lid on is either to pay another $3,000 for an extra-large coffin or to amputate his member”.“Well I have no more money” states the widow “and it is against my religion for me to bury my husband in more than one piece”.The funeral director thinks about this and then comes up with a brainwave: He’ll amputate his dick and then. " So you sulk and don't go?" Katherine asked her eyes following the tortured expression on Matthew's face."Hardly much point, is there? I mean, I ain't wanting to spend all evening on me own."Katherine bit her lip as his sour tone of voice and turned back to the paper in front of her. "I don't have a partner either. I split up with Sam. But I am going." Matthew sniffed and she looked back up at him. "You could go with me." Matthew bit his lip and Katherine took a deep breath. "Otherwise I'll be. More

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