You need to do that on your own time.”I was deflated. For a minute I had hoped she would be on board. Well, I guess, me and my NYT were just going t... be jerking off together.On my birthday the following week in the morning I found an envelope on the kitchen table. Inside was a card that read: “Happy Birthday, Love. Enjoy your gift. All you newspaper wishes from now on will be fulfilled by Mistress Phoenix. I already talked to her. Please make an appointment through her website.”I immediately. He rolled all the windows down. They drove, not talking, to the unincorporated, one-horse burg a few miles away, named after a famous city in Europe, and went to The Cow Lick. The gravel parking lot was full of pickup trucks, motorcycles, and little teenager cars. It was families, older people, farm kids on dates, picnic tables, little kids. They leaned on the fender of his car, having swirl ice cream, commenting about nothing in particular. He noticed she’d walked across the gravel in her. More

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