They would call me girl names and lewd remarks about how I would be in bed. They would ask me to go to the girls' hostel. At other times they would op...nly proposition me offering me small amounts of money, making suggestions about different kinds of sex acts.A little detail about how I felt regarding men would help here. When I went out with my mom, I loved manly men. I liked the men who came into her life, who pampered her with gifts and paid her money. I loved their looks, their wide strong. ‘You always fuck someone.’ There was an unsteady breath. ‘You always fuck someone, I always get upset, and we always get over it three days later.’ ‘Yeah, I know the drill.’ I muttered. ‘Then why aren’t you telling me?’ I could feel his eyes on me, but I didn’t turn to meet their gaze. ‘Pete.’ I didn’t want this. I didn’t want to say it, didn’t want to hear/see/taste/smell/feel the reaction. I didn’t want to tell him that I’d fucked Ryan. I knew it, I knew it. ‘I don’t want to talk about it.’ I. More

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