The combination is random but wonderfully held together in the florists’ wrap. “Thank you. Please, come on in.” I lead the way into the lounge a... Jack shuts the door and follows me. He lets out a low whistle on surveying the room. His eyes take in the family photographs and stylish decorations, which have become my allocated hobby thanks to my husband. “You have a beautiful home, Pen.” Jack goes to stroke the family dog as she sleeps on the couch. Our beagle raises her head dolefully and lets. That was what kept me coming back. I needed to feel that, even if just for a little bit. That seduction was what kept me from running away; the promise of something beautiful in my life. But it was killing me, too. Not just my body, but my heart. Giving up so much of myself just for that fix. When I wasn’t high I began to despise myself. That’s why I’d let myself get caught. Seattle, Summer ‘09 I’d thought about her more than once. Just random thoughts like, I wonder how she’s doing. I could. More

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