To the evening I discovered the truth. No. Stop it. Shit. This is driving me crazy.On a sudden impulse I jump into the sea, swimming a short distance....It helps to clear my mind. It stops me from getting angry again: from falling into the seething rage that made me avoid other people, especially women. I need to prevent my rage spilling onto innocent bystanders, like it did so often during the last months.It was my sister Annette who told me I´m a ticking time bomb. She was right, of course. She. It might be cruel of me to think so, but I was glad that Iwas not one of them to be sent outside again. I had been begging forfood for two years since my parents had died. Food was hard to come byfor a ten-year-old boy that did not know how to do anything worthearning money or food. I tried hard, but I was just to small foranything. I was more the size of an eight year old child then a tenyear old young man. Two years of begging for food had taken all of themeat off my bones. I was truly. More

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