. incredibly lonely.I am pretty desperate at this point - needing some kind of sexual release. I don't think I could ever cheat on my wife. Having nev...r cheated or been cheated on, it just doesn't feel like an option. Looking for some way to feel better, I join Lush. It becomes my escape from reality and I begin reading and even writing stories about sex.I successfully publish a few stories about some of my fantasies. To be honest, it feels good. When readers comment on my fantasies, they help. I understood what you meant about using a knife over a gun. Every time I tried to fall asleep I saw his eyes. I didn't get any sleep. I also understand what you meant when you said that if you kill with a knife it shows that you love life more, because you don't want to kill, unless you have to. I think that I understand, you kill when you have to, to protect yourself, or family, or your people, but not if you can help it. One of us was going to have to kill that man last night, and I wish that. More

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