I try to clear my head and calm my breathing, but I feel like puddy in his hands.Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. The word rings in my head tim... and time again. Yet I am incapable of resisting him it seems. Still I try. My pathetic and half-hearted attempt to resist ends in my wrists being held in his vice like hand.I feel tense and calm at the same time, it confuses me. He radiates control and calm. My mind tells me not to give way and resist, though at this point it seems senseless.. She let my hair grow out and every morning, she'd put me in tight curlers,which I'd wear all day and at night (with a few pins and a hairnet). In themorning she'd take them out and start over again. My hair was only styled andout of curlers for special occasions. But she did something that effected my life, I think, even more than thediapers. One day, she had friends over, like she always did and they werelaughing at me, like they always did. One of the women brought along her 75year old. More

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