I screamed so hard it tore at my throat. It hurt even worse than last night when he finally managed to force it into my throat! It hurt so much that I...very nearly lost consciousness. My mind and my body couldn't deal with that much pain.I suppose that I'm not the first woman to suffer this fate on this stage. They were ready for me when my mind attempted to seek refuge in unconsciousness. Someone waved smelling salts under my nose.When my vision cleared I saw that it was the young girl who,. Gently steered me through these uncharted waters. Of course we wentback through my childhood and adolescence, mining them for whatever cluesthey might provide.It would be very tidy and it would make a good story if I told you thatthere was some "aha" moment or some epiphany where it all came togetherin a blinding flash and I could walk out of Dr. Hansen's office a newperson ready to face all of life's challenges. It would be nice, but itwouldn't be true. When I agreed to see her, I knew that. More

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