She also spent some time bathing me with water she had fetched up in that garbage bin I mentioned earlier. She then dressed me in assorted ornaments s...e had made; necklaces, bangles and a string of seashells about my waist. All this was conducted in the greatest seriousness and I held my peace, somehow recognising the solemnity of the proceedings.She seemed to go through a series of ritualised dances and postures and the little amber carving featured heavily in this for she carried it about. That’s how you cope. But deep down, in a place you don’t want to look for fear of what you’ll find, you want her to approve of you and to see you as you see yourself. She’s not going to, and until you give up on that, you won’t be able to become the person you want to be or the person I need you to be. You’ll marry a girl your mom approves of. Some virginal, conservative girl who is extremely religious and has the same exact hang-ups that your mom does about sex. And you’ll cheat on her because. More

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