When your heart hurts, it means your alive.’ I let out a shaky breath. ‘I don’t know if I remember how…’ His eyebrows knitted together. ‘B...t, I will try.’ His face relaxed and he smiled up at me. I leaned down and kissed his forehead. I stared down at his face. ‘You look like you’ve lost weight.’ He rolled his eyes. ‘You was right, the food here isn’t exactly fine dining. Plus, laying in this bed isn’t helping my muscle tone. And, I haven’t had a real bath in almost a month.’ I smiled at him,. I promised.”After a moment, he patted my back a few times and pulled his hand away.“That’s okay, John. But can you please tell me what are you planning to do now?”Now, this was the moment - and the question - I had been preparing myself for. Somehow, I was quite certain that all his friendly gestures had only been there to make me more responsive to this moment. Instead of hiding my nervousness and distress, I allowed it all to surface. My hands were almost shaking in my lap and I did not know. More

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