A few days before I was due to fly home to the UK, my friends had to catch an earlier flight and move on to Australia, so I was on my own. That’s wh...n disaster struck. My plane ticket, phone, credit cards, cash – pretty much everything except my passport – was stolen from the hotel where we’d been staying.First thing I did was ring the airline to ask about a new ticket, and they said the cheapest would be about 18,000 rupees. I tried to ring some friends to ask them to wire me some money but. "The next man to laugh will be transferred to a platoon of penguins at the South Pole!" barked the frustrated Major. The snickering was instantly swallowed, but the smiles could only be hidden."Four bells on the First Watch and all is well!" intoned the ship's AI."No, all is bloody well not well," muttered Sub-Decurion Chan."AI, can you tell the difference between sponsor, concubine and dependant when they're all nude like that?" Tribune Whitefeather demanded."Affirmative, Tribune Whitefeather.. More

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