Actually, I don’t know why he bothered. I’m not going to need it. He’s truly kidding himself if he thinks that I will be having sex tonight with...somebody else. “Dress up seductively”, he told me as we were getting ready to go out. Tonight was the night that I had agreed, quite reluctantly I must add, to act one of his fantasies. Maybe “act out” is a bit strong. Go through the motions is a lot closer to reality. It revolves around me sitting by myself in one of the upscale hotel bars where. Then and there, I learned the meaning of turning the other cheek.My biggest regret is for my husband, his knowing I had sex with another from the swinging fiasco, his life being a lie from then on, the bedeviled pain his suspicions of my wantonness caused. He’s never known me, the whole me, the wayward puppet shadow, the hidden me, the spy lying next to him in bed. I regret the energy and time spent for others meant less for him and the unmentioned divide it causes between us in old age, the. More

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