When I had dropped the car off I walked home and went into the house via the french doors leading to the kitchen.When I entered I stopped dead when I ...aw the most stunning woman I had ever seen sitting at our table drinking coffee. "Oh Lisa this is my son Sam. Sam this is Lisa our new neighbour". For what seemed a lifetime I just stared then managed to say "hi pleased to meet you", then I sat down at the table.Lisa was a curvy blue eyed blonde her hair went passed her shoulders and she had. ?its too full you lazy pig you should empty it more often but now youcan dump it on that cute salad you have there? I let a few cigarette buts drop on it an in a flash the words ALL OF ITappeared on my screen.? My salad was ruinedhow could I be expected to eat that.?Then I saw those ?laughing? smileys appear on the screen?lots ofthem.? I felt sick. ?OK shiteater, turn around and bend over its time to add the maincourse with your cigarette salad. You will shit on the plate and do it now? I got. More

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