“My son, I have lived a ling, full life. Take the other parachute and save yourself.”The Boy Scout just smiles. “Don’t worry, Your Holiness. T...e world’s smartest man just jumped out of the plane wearing my backpack!”The following items are compliments of J & B.After the brief Falkland Islands war, a British regiment commander was addressing some troops under his command who had heroically performed above and beyond the call of duty. He informed them that Her Majesty’s Army had committed to. “What is that supposed to mean?” Jake mumbled, trying the shake off the man’s hand. Klaus didn’t seem to be bothered by his lame attempts, though.“It means that the word ‘devour’ can be used as a euphemism for something else. And don’t ask something stupid like ‘what else’ because I am not in the mood to hear you insulting your own intelligence.”“Intelligence?” Jake snorted. “If you really plan on teaching me stuff, you’re going to have a bad day. I’m dumb as a brick.”He had no idea why he was. More

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