"Lookee here."she started. "We come here to see our Grandson. Providence showed us somethin' better, and made some o' th' best folks we ever knowed, k...own to us. We're long overdue to sit back, spoil young uns when they git here, and have a good time. We got a new fambly, and it would seem poorly of us NOT ta take advantage of it. We kin sell the old places, and live good off that, an' our pensions. All we got ta do is wait fer Essie an' Bruce ta make us Great Grands. Both o' em', SPECIALLY. ” Dick soon realised the alien spoke not only completely in caps, but largely only in Too $hort lyrics. Suddenly it all made sense – Too $hort had to be an alien. Only someone who had observed earth culture from the outside, but never lived it, could have composed songs and rhymes so terrible and yet still thought they had any merit whatsoever. The alien was Too $hort.He might've been called Too $hort, but his dick was jolly long. "Long as a log," thought Dick, as logs of shit were removed from. More

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