"A spotlight flashed on Stage Left where Robyn and I would soon make ourentrance."As you watch," Edie continued, "I want you to listen to the words......andthink about them." Her voice picked up as she prepared for her song."You've all heard of Talking Heads. Well get a load of Walking Butts!"The music kicked on full force as the lesbian stage hand casuallyprodded us in a very private place, forcing Robyn and me to mince onstage. Riotous cheering rattled my ear drums, even as blindingspotlights. She graduated with honors, studying to become a lawyer. I just squeaked by with a C average, just barely getting my bachelor’s degree in Communications. Around this time it started to become clear to me how much better than me she was in just about every way, and I think she started to notice as well. I made a vow to myself that I would not lose this amazing woman. I had tried for years to make myself a better man. I tried dieting and exercising, I tried to improve my school performance, I. More

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