’ I pushed through the door to the crowded beer side where the bartender was pouring small glasses and heard him say, ‘And this one is called Dog...Sled!’ People began barking and shouting, ‘Who let the dogs out…’ I was home. Through the window, on the wine side, I saw a woman so stunning she took my breath away. I drained my glass, waved for a refill and wondered if a mixed marriage could work. History ‘Man those sheets! Ready about!’ The Commander stood helmside, braced against the heaving. I.T.'s still playing up." Come again?" The Combined Location In Time array. I set it for the time of Cheops and when do we go? Bloody Ptolemaic Dynasty, that's all. It really is too bad, Jonty. Bloody Microsoft!" Oh, come on, Prof. You surely can't blame Bill Gates for this one?" Of course I can. I wrote the programme using all the redundant bits from Windows 98. Bloody thing has never worked properly." That's what you get for using Princess Di software." Princess Di?" Yeah, you know, consumes. More

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