You've met before I believe, even if you didn't know it. Don, this is my mother Charlene."I wondered how Miss Manors would handle this? I don't suppos... she has ever been asked about the etiquette of meeting your lover's mother when you are dressed only in a bra and skirt. Should I rise and coolly shake her hand? Was the quintessential feminine gesture of covering my artificial breasts in order here? How about running to the bathroom and being violently ill? What I did was reach for my sweater. I started to think if I should follow her but John started talking to me about something and I hesitated. John's words went in one ear and out the other. I could see his lips move but my mind was a million miles away. I looked at John with his thinning hair and skinny arms and thought, what a lucky bastard. If I had a wife like his I would be home every night at five bearing gifts as she greeted me with open arms, and legs. Just as I started to think about getting up, for about the tenth time. More

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