A couple purchased a talking parrot on their honeymoon--much to the groom's annoyance, since the bird kept a running commentary on their lovemaking.Th... groom finally threw a towel over the cage and threatened to give the parrot to the zoo if it didn't shut up.The next morning, packing to return home, the newlyweds couldn't close the large suitcase."Honey," the groom said, "you get on top and I'll try." That didn't work.Figuring they needed more weight on the lid, the bride said, "Sweetheart,. You lost count of how many times you swatted her ass over your college years.You guys are living in a small apartment complex with few neighbors. You begin your medium-paying job with a shady corporation. You have been working nonstop for your boss, putting in a ridiculous amount of hours. You spent about seventy-five mindless hours of brokering deals for your boss. You lost nights of sex with Amy as she knew you were going to get a huge promotion and get her into her fabulous dream house. Her. More

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