”“Yes thank you cook, when I need your advice I will ask for it.” I advised.“Don’t stop you wanting your nob sucked though do it?” she cam... back. “You find a nice wench and woo her, if you want’s my advice, you ent bad looking, and you ent short of a shilling, there’s lots of wenches would jump at chance.”“Really? Here? Twenty miles from civlisation?” I queried.“There’s the vicar’s daughter.” she said.“Dear god she’s fatter than you, and uglier,” I pointed out.“I spose it be a back hand. She smiles and spins a full 360 degrees from the excitement and sudden fear, not sure where to go. “Oh my God, that’s a big dog!” She laughs, clearly taken aback by the sheer scale of the animal.He is walked over next to her and the tops of his shoulders are level with her pelvis. She nervously strokes his huge head, looking up into camera to note that, “He really is very big...”And then she’s on her knees beside him, heads level with each other. The dog appears completely disinterested in her. More

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