“Care to buy me a drink?” “My pleasure,” I said. As we arrived to the bar she turned and asked me what I was going to have to drink. “A very...dirty, no a filthy dirty, vodka martini,” I replied. “And how about you?” “Oh, I’ll be boring and just have a Cosmo.” I ordered the drinks and when they were ready handed over the conical glass filled with pink liquid to her, while I took a quick slurp of the slightly muddy fluid in mine. “Can I have a sip,” she asked. “I like things dirty.” “Sure,” I said. There he was next to his mother’s car. She had driven home but couldn’t get out of the car. She was drunk as a skunk. I unhooked her seatbelt, grabbed her under her arms, and pulled her out of the car. I grabbed her right under her breasts while Teddy grabbed his mother’s feet. Together we got her in the house but that was as far as Teddy could carry her. Apparently she had let him stay home along while she went drinking. My mother would turn her in for child abuse. She certainly wouldn’t let. More

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