“For the benefit of the observers in the courtroom, both of these offenses are very rare; you might not even find the words in a dictionary. Champer...y is the sharing in the proceeds of a lawsuit by an outside party — in this case, Ms. McCarthy’s sponsoring foundation — who has promoted the litigation. Barratry is the offense of persistently instigating lawsuits, typically groundless ones.“I’m sure many of you have seen advertisements placed by trial lawyers looking for plaintiffs. It might be. Oh sure! Then that *terrible* wrinkle in the sheet right on her little ol' backside: I needed a detailed description of course. Oh, I felt *so* sorry for *her*! *And* whatever it was that I was doing with her boob? Could I just *please* be so kind to continue? *Whatever* that was. Jenny hadn't even noticed that I hardly was listening at that point. Instead I had got up to get her next little surprise. She just kept right on talking, that is, of course, until she felt another scarf slip into her. More

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