We loved each other but our marriage was suffering so immensely it was clear it would turn sour eventually, it was just a question of when.Derrick’s...issue, primarily, was impotence. He had some issues feeling confident and it created this feedback loop that would make the issue worse with every passing night in bed. My issue was vaginismus, a painful cramping in my internal muscles around my pelvic floor that made it painful to have sex. This started spontaneously one day and through testing. It was late July, hot. Even so, there were still snowdrifts on the granite bluffs below the peaks above.JoAnn would never have come up here with me. Not that we could have, without the Jeep, but mountains were toxic to her. I think she was allergic to clean air. I could say that I wondered why we ever married, but I knew. Like I said, she was so fuckin’ gorgeous and a young man’s, probably even an old man’s, brain sort of malfunctions around a girl like JoAnn. I guess the real mystery was why. More

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